The name “belief-busting” is a misnomer. There's no such thing as a limiting belief. I know that may sound strange for someone who makes a living eliminating them, but it actually makes my job a lot easier. You're going to discover that changing how you perceive “limiting beliefs” can massively increase the effectiveness of Sleight of Mouth & the other processes of conversational belief change.

Beliefs are generalisations, learned processes that help us make sense of an ambiguous world. Beliefs help us make guesses about what to expect & what to do. But for every generalisation, there are exceptions. The process of belief-change is about artfully bringing those exceptions into awareness so as to redirect the process of generalisation.

Beliefs are perceptions, a way of organising sensory data to arrive at certain conclusions. The idea that a belief is “limiting” is just that – an idea; a perception about a perception.

Beliefs have a positive intention. Remember the old saying, “Every behaviour has a positive intention”? It applies to beliefs too. If you try & change a belief without at least acknowledging that intention, you're in danger of activating its defence mechanisms. This can be as simple as asking “What's the positive intention of this belief? What's it been doing for you?”

Beliefs are self-protective & survival-oriented. We create beliefs for a reason, & even the ones you've been perceiving as “limiting” have a purpose. If you try & change them without rapport (ie. acknowledging their purpose, pacing & leading etc.) you may invoke their defence mechanisms. When a person gets defensive, it typically means you're trying to change a belief without rapport.

Beliefs have a structure & a state. The structure includes sensory representations, physical sensations & a linguistic form. Sleight of mouth is a set of linguistic reframing tools for redirecting the generalisations that support the belief. When its done effectively, the generalisations open up to include new information & the belief is no longer perceived as limiting.

Here are a few tips to bear in mind when you're doing  sleight of mouth & conversational belief change:

Assume a larger outcome, purpose or direction. When people perceive a belief as limiting them, it's because  they perceive it as blocking them from achieving a particular goal or moving in a certain direction. Over time, they sometimes lose awareness of that larger goal or purpose, but you can bring it back into awareness by asking “What larger goal or outcome has this been preventing you from achieving until now?”

Assume people can always do (on some level) what they say they can't. Bear in mind that what they say (the linguistic structure of the belief) is just a metaphor for some deeper representation anyway, so you don't have to worry about whether their belief is “realistic” or not. Assume that the fact that they've said “I can't X” means that they can X.

Wire in the language patterns & experiment. The patterns of Sleight of Mouth & conversational belief change take practice in order to achieve unconscious competence. The Milton Model & the Meta Model are also essential tools. Enjoy playing with them to wire them in at an unconscious level.

Know your outcome & be present, aware & intuitive. To paraphrase Bandler & Grinder, language patterns are not a substitute for a sense of direction, open sensory channels & behavioural flexibility.